True confession: for the first three four five months that I knew Mike (pre-Facebook-official dating status), I stalked him.
I knew that if I left my class exactly at 10:05 and walked down a certain hallway at a certain speed, we would likely cross paths. I knew where he ate lunch and where he got picked up to go to sailing practice. I knew his favorite library to study in.
(This is the stuff Lifetime movies are made of.)
In fact, I knew his favorite chair in his favorite library. And I would sit directly behind it.
(I AM THE CREEPIEST CREEP.)
I would sit in that chair acting all indifferent like, Ohhhh…hey. You study at this library too? That’s cool I guess.
And I would wait until he finished his studying and was packing up and super casually be like, Ohhh, are you leaving too? Wanna walk together? Can I carry your books? I know where you live.
You cannot make this stuff up.
While I was putting in long hours stalking (studying! I was studying.) at the library, I would get these amaaaaaazing butterscotch blondies from the library cafe. They were so dense and chewy and buttery and I easily ate one (or five) every day.
Flash forward six years, and I’m recreating the blondies in our kitchen. I give one to Mike to try and he’s like WHAT ARE THESE THIS IS THE BEST THING I’VE EVER EATEN DO NOT SHARE THEM WITH ANYONE EVER I LOOOOOOVE YOU.
OH, so all I really had to do to win your love was hand you a butterscotch blondie?? The very butterscotch blondie I was chomping on THE ENTIRE TIME I STALKED YOU???
Irony, people. This. Is. Irony.
If you’ve learned anything from me today, let it be this: if you ever find yourself in a stalking situation, don’t forget to bring baked goods.
Also? These blondies really are SO SO SO SO YUMMY DON’T SHARE THEM WITH ANYONE I LOOOOOVE YOU.
Butterscotch Blondies (adapted from Martha Stewart)
yield: about 16
Ingredients
- 1/2 cup unsalted butter, browned and cooled
- 3/4 cup packed light-brown sugar
- 1 large egg
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 cup all-purpose flour
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 1 cup butterscotch chips
Directions
- Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Coat an 8×8-inch pan with cooking spray (I line my pan with tinfoil before coating it with cooking spray for extra-easy removal).
- In a small pan, brown your butter. Transfer to a medium-sized bowl and allow it to cool until it is warm to the touch. Whisk in the brown sugar, then add the egg and vanilla and whisk until smooth. With a rubber spatula, fold in the flour, salt, and butterscotch chips until combined.
- Spread the mixture into the prepared pan and bake for about 40 minutes, or until the top is golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Don’t over bake these, you want them to be a bit gooey inside! Allow to cool fully on a wire rack, then remove from the pan and cut into squares.
